Phase One: A Fiery Passion
Some blame their brilliant ideas on a freak accident or inspiration from a TV show, but I blame my idea off of my love for comics. The whole concept rolls always the way back into my toddler years. You'll understand why in a moment. Ever since I couldn't remember, I was obsessed with Spyro the Dragon. My first game was Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly. My second was the first Spyro game ever made. I eventually bought The Legend of Spyro: A New Beginning. From there, my love for dragons and Spyro really turned into a true obsession. Every time I went to the swap-meet, I would buy a Spyro balloon. I bought millions of dragon statues, posters, games, movies, etc… After the sequel came out, which was The Legend of Spyro: The Eternal Night, I developed a passion for Spyro. I could see the feelings in the video, the dialogue, the character development, everything! From there, my love for Spyro went to the computer. I would go to the website to check on the series and even play games. I anticipated the final game my entire childhood. And the day did come that I refreshed the Spyro website homepage and the release date for The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon was given. I waited for the game, bought it, played it, obsessed over it, admired it, fell in love with it, and my love for both dragons and Spyro grew bigger and stronger. After completing the games over and over, I wanted to get even more dragon-obsessed. I found a game that is currently still in production that involved dragons. The game was called Dragons MMO. I watched their trailer for their game, and I saw the related videos on the screen. I clicked the first one I saw… It had something to do with a pink dragon named Ember. I read more into the story behind Ember. At this time, I was nine. I found out Ember was a dragoness who was madly in love with Spyro in a previous Spyro game. I became an admirer of the love triangle between Spyro, Cynder and Ember. Spyro loved Cynder, and Cynder loved him back, but Ember loved Spyro. That was when I found deviantART. I searched something, not sure what, but when I did, I found a comic about how Ember wanted to fight Cynder for Spyro. Cynder won, and I fell in love from the comic and dragons even more. I started to write my own Spyro comics from there. I filled an entire container with my comics. I wrote them all the way up until I was ten. I wanted so badly to become famous for being a comic writer, but it never happened… Obviously. I took a break from there. I began to actually make my account on deviantART useful. My best friend of all time, Angel Darton, and I were writing a story together. I met her in the third grade, when my dragon obsession was still in full flight. We became best friends because of our love for dragons. Pretty soon, we became obsessed with Ice Age 3. We both loved this one character named Buck. He was an insane weasel. We both loved him because he was so funny! We were in the fifth grade when we wrote our first story The Weasel Sisters. The story was a fan fiction of Ice Age 3. From there, we came up with countless ideas. Majority of them were based off of our first story. Others were about dragons. We would spend weeks on end, writing, drawing and brain storming. This was when we knew we were soul sisters. We loved each other like family, and we were sure our friendship would never end… And it never did.
Phase Two: Alienated
As everyone knows, all good ideas must come to a conclusion. Back when I was still in the fifth grade, Angel and I became obsessed with Invader Zim. We would watch the shows on youtube, search images of the characters, write fan fictions together, draw the characters together, and even draw our own. I remember it so well… This was also the birth of the ever famous, Liz. I drew an Invader Zim version of me, which was Liz. Angel came up with a robot character named LUV. Liz built LUV as an irken robot prototype. Our Invader Zim was bigger than our dragon obsession ever was. We would even role play in class for our fan fictions. We would constantly brain storm. Our teacher loved to see our friendship grow stronger with every new idea… I posted all of my ideas on deviantART. Angel and I never left an idea alone. We would always have characters to go with it, or a storyline to back it up. We had the strongest imaginations in the entire school. Even the fight between she and I couldn't stop our creativity for poking us in the backs and luring us closer together. We were strange, loner, dumb kids, but life was amazing back then… Life was all it could be. Life was colorful, right, peaceful, fun and full of passion.
Phase Three: A Crazy Idea
Here was when my love for comics sucked me back in. During a sleep over, Angel and I did some youtube lurking. We caught memo of the secret Invader Zim Easter eggs. The one that changed our lives forever was the infamous, bloody GIR. They were hidden in episodes, but you had to screenshot the episode and look carefully for a bloody GIR hidden in the background. It was a tiny image of GIR covered in blood. We found a youtube video explaining why Invader Zim was cancelled. It was because of bloody GIR hidden in the episodes. It said something about the creator being a sick and twisted guy. His name was Jhonen Vasquez. At first, I really hated the creator for doing that to the show, but it wasn't until years later that I found out the creator cancelled the show, and because he was bored. Not because Nickelodeon wanted to protect the mature ratings of the channel. But anyway… We watched the video, and found out the creator also wrote a comic called Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. We binged it, and low and beyond, we found some pretty fucked up images of a homicidal man, named Johnny, or Nny. Angel left the next morning, and over the course of a week, I became obsessed with Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, and Jhonen Vasquez. And as always, Angel and I had one more thing to fangirl over.
Phase Four: A Love for Comics
I eventually wrote my own comics and fan fictions of JTHM. Liz also formed. She wasn't just an Invader Zim OC anymore. She was an overall OC. And as the fangirling rolled, so did the years. In the sixth grade, my dark, twisted, fucked up side grow stronger. Angel and I were still friends even though we were in different schools. It was towards the beginning of seventh grade that everything in life had changed. I had a boyfriend, who was Codey. Angel had a boyfriend. I met Ryan, I met Da'Vannah, my family was falling apart, and my fame on deviantART had escalated dramatically. I had already created Zero the voodoo master, Luke Mute, and Liz was a full blown adapted OC. I was getting started on my latest idea… Trippy Insane School, the comic.
Phase Five: The Strongest Passion
By now, I had already mastered the comic skill. My obsession for JTHM formed into an obsession with Jhonen Vasquez, the creator. This man is my idol. Everything he did was a marvel in my eyes. He was a good looking nerd who gets paid to draw! I wanted to be just like him! At this same time, I decided I would be just like him. I would be a cartoonist and a director. He helped me to get into Mindless Self Indulgence. And my love for Foamy the Squirrel came from Mindless Self Indulgence, but I digress. Jhonen Vasquez made up 95% of my life. Invader Zim, JTHM, my friendship with Angel, it all because of him. It was because of his brilliance. My inspiration came from this man's work. He was funny, smart, stupid and everything I ever wanted to be. He was an artist, and I wanted to be an artist. I was an artist. I wanted to follow in this man's footsteps and be sure that his impact on young, impressionable, creative minds would serve as a good thing. I wanted nothing more than to become a young, female Jhonen Vasquez. My heart didn't love this man's creativity because he made funny shows and cool comics, it was because he could turn humanity's flaws, ups and wonders into art. He turned physiologic trouble into a seven part comic! It was behind the art that I loved so much. It was his imagery on everything. It was his speeches at interviews, his appearances at comic cons, his ironic humor, everything. And no, I was no Jhonen Vasquez fangirl. I was an admirer of his work, and I wanted to do my best to be just like him. He was creative, artistic, smart, hilarious, and such an amazing guy. I wanted to be all these things. I wanted be the amazing artist he had come to be.
Phase Six: Crack Fantasies
I was more into Watership Down at the time. And also at this same time, I was single. I had been through a scrap with Ryan and Codey. But regardless of status, I was thirteen and aiming to the last days of 7th grade. Since my rabbit love was growing, I started an original story called Pine on the Prairie. I had already been through my Watership Down obsession with Angel. In fact, I don't think there was one thing that she and I didn't obsess about… But anyway. I was still into Jhonen Vasquez's work, but I wanted to get into different things. I brought our Watership Down original characters back into the present. It was cool because starting fresh with new characters was my favorite thing to do. The first character was a white rabbit with grey ears and feet. Her name was Neve. The second character was Midnight, who was Angel as a rabbit. There also Kodi, the brown rabbit who was Codey. Bronze, the orange rabbit who was my big brother. Crimson, the red rabbit who was my childhood friend, Snowy. Nuka, the brown rabbit with white tips who was actually Ryan. And finally, LC. I finished the story, but also ran a comic called Pine on the Prairie, relating to the story, but in a comedic relief sense. They became extremely popular, so I gave them their own comic. I spent many minutes trying to decide the name for this comic… Satan Bunny? Insane Rabbits? Rambunctious Rodents? No… None of it was any good! But then finally, I heard a voice in the back of my mind. It said, "Cracked Rabbits." So that's what I did. I made the first Cracked Rabbits comic. The first rabbits were Kodi and Neve. And the first one to speak was Kodi. Did I forget to mention Codey and I were back together?
Phase Seven: Humor Set to Hyper
The comics were the most popular thing in my gallery. I was going through some changes at the time as well. Moral changes, physical changes, emotional changes, school changes and even friendship changes. Here was when Cracked Rabbits became part of my life…
Phase Eight: I Blamed the Mood Swings
Okay not really… But yeah. I went through a moving experience. Now, I've been to the comic con, I'm making financial plans for Cracked Rabbits, my family is at its worse, my relationships are all over the place, but I'm happy. I even have my own website for Cracked Rabbits. I think I'm the most successful I've ever been. I honestly think my world was changed, ten-fold. I know you might have some questions like, "Is Jhonen still your idol? What do you plan to do with yourself from here? Is everything under control?" And the answers to those questions are yes, I am still a forever admirer of Jhonen Vasquez, everything is pretty stable, and for that other question… Well, I'm not sure. I guess I will continue to look forward to that T-Shirt idea for Cracked Rabbits. I'm pretty confident in it. I guess I will take a quote from my favorite comic of all time…
"Dear Die-ary, there's nothing terribly wrong with feeling lost. So long as that feeling precedes some plan on your part to actually do something about it. Too often a person grows complacent with their disillusionment, perpetually wearing their 'discomfort' like a favorite shirt. I can't say I'm very pleased with where my life is just now, but I can't help but look forward to where it's going."
-Johnny the Homicidal Maniac.